I’m just going to come right out and say it – I find those dry huge turkey legs that have been baking in the sun at Disneyland more appealing than another “Pirates of the Caribbean”. I’m sorry, but those last two blew like a toothless two-buck hooker! Hell, I think I’ve had more fun on the actual “Pirates of the Caribbean” ride! (And that’s saying something)
Don’t get me wrong, I love Gore Verbinski’s original film but I have the same problem with the “Pirates” ‘sequels’ as I do the latter “Matrix” movies – there’s too much going on, not enough humour, and the tonal switch (in “Pirates” case, from swashbuckler comedy to supernatural ghost movie) is a turn-off.
I couldn’t be less enthused about this next “Pirates”, “Pirates of the Caribbean : On Stranger Tides” BUT I hold out hope that director Rob Marshall has returned the franchise to it’s roots – more laughs, more adventure, less zombies, less special effects.
HitFix reported overnight that we’ll be
tortured treated to a further two “Pirates” films – both of which will shoot back-to-back (like “Dead Man’s Chest” and “At World’s End”). Now I hope this means that Disney are psyched by what they’re seeing so far of “On Stranger Tides” and that’s the impetus for greenlighting two more so early, but I might also be inclined to believe the house of Mouse has simply given the OK to two more based on the fact that, well, it’s a “Pirates of the Caribbean” movie someone wants to make two more of. They could be rubbish, but they’ll make money – and that, as we all know, is the literal bottom line.
When are these next two films going to go before the cameras? Hard to say. As HitFix point out, Depp’s got both “Dark Shadows” and “The Lone Ranger” coming up next year, so it’s not likely he’ll be applying any mascara again until 2012 at the earliest.
- Olsens talk Fuller House – will they do it? - April 25, 2015
- Batman injured; Goodbye cancelled - April 25, 2015
- SNL alum joins Zoolander 2 - April 25, 2015
- First Look : Jared Leto as The Joker! - April 25, 2015
- Some new Terminator : Genisys TV spots - April 25, 2015
- Another Avenger joins Captain America : Civil War - April 24, 2015
- Zach Galligan, Gremlins reboot is calling! - April 24, 2015
- Trailer : Area 51 - April 24, 2015
- Trailer : The Visit - April 24, 2015
- Production kicks off on Evil Dead series - April 24, 2015
Against the Current - the band, not adventures in dangerous swimming 101
Zedd - If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? (Well, answer my question!)
Arrow (Okay, Felicity from Arrow!)
Chrissy Costanza (cat eyes and buttery lyrics!)
Girls (TV) (Okay, Allison Williams!)
Movies - especially when they play in the dark.
Twin Peaks (TV)
Friends (TV) (It had me at "No way are you cool enough to pull Clint"; damn straight, Chandler!)
Traveling - preferably where water is, so I can splash someone!
Star Wars trilogy - no, the other one, fella!
Alex G - far more talented than her younger brother Alex H
Cameron Crowe movies - Say Anything..., Jerry Maguire, Almost Famous
The sign 'Free Wi-Fi'.
Reenacting dance/song scenes from "Grease" with my little girl (hey! Wait till you see my 'Summer Lovin'! - don't judge)
Die Hard - 40 stories of Sheer Adventure!
Alex Goot & Friends (his enemies aren't half as talented!)
Cooking up a nice dish and sitting in the entertainment area, on a cool night, basking in it's greatness.
Inflatable kids pools full of Vodka Lime Crush.
Acidic Email from angry, over passionate teenagers after I trash something "Twilight"-related on the site. Sparkle elsewhere.
My baby girl's big, caring heart.